Broken and Battered.....

Start Of Chapter - 16th May 2004, 1:04:27 am

" They say Happiness wears different masks, comes in many guises. There are lucky ones where Happiness finds them. I'm not so blessed. I've tried to find Happiness many times. Just when I thought I have Happiness within my grasps, she slips away.

My quest to search for Happiness has been a long and painful journey. Along the way, we might meet someone who might point us in the right direction, someone who can provide us with the right items, a person with wisdom and experience to offer. In the end, it is a journey one has to take alone.

After losing my way many times, I thought I was back on the right path. The path that would lead me to Happiness. I've seen the signs. The signs couldn't have been wrong.

The birds were chirping, the sun was shining. That's when I saw Happiness, in the distance. I could hear Happiness calling out to me. I thought I was almost there, Happiness was just within reach. I made my way towards the voice, Happiness was whispering out to me - leading me towards her.

Suddenly thick, black clouds form around me. The clouds are too fast for me. I cannot run and there's nowhere to hide. Then Darkness hits me, its all around me. There is so much pain I have to close my eyes.

Sadness, Pain, Anger, Disappointment, Failure.....they're all taunting me. How does one feel so many emotions at the same time? Then I realise I'm only human, my weakness.

Was it really Happiness calling out to me? Or someone else in disguise?

I open my eyes to find Happiness is nowhere to be seen. She's gone. Everything gone in moments. Everything I've done to get here - has it been in vain? Has everything gone to waste? All hope feels lost.

Now, I'm stranded in an empty field. I see people in the distance. Maybe people I've met before, perhaps familiar faces. They'll be searching for something of their own. I have to find my way back.

People always say its the journey, not the destination. And someone once said what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Perhaps there is wisdom in those words. There is a lesson to be learnt.

Right now, I'm broken and battered.....I'm lost and alone again. I need time to heal."

End Of Chapter - 31st January 2005, 11:35:55 pm

- To Be Continued -

The words "You'll always be a good friend" - no matter how many times you hear it, it's always the same. It hurts like hell.

It's always about me, not about her. From the way things seem to appear, I've finally come to realise that I was the problem, not her. I just don't know why I was blind not to see it earlier. But then why did it seem otherwise? Was it all a lie?